Organize Your Year: Bible Reading and Giveaway!

Nothing like the beginning of a new year to plan out your spiritual journey! There are MANY MANY people (myself included) who strive to read the Bible in a year. To be honest, I never succeed. So I gave up on that goal. Then my goal became to read the Bible every day. That was MUCH better but I STILL struggled. 

But I am not striving for a perfect calendar. I am striving for growing my relationship with God. That is my true goal. So if I mess it up and miss a day it's okay because my GOAL is not to read every day but to grow closer to God so that at the end of this year, I can look back and say:

"God, thank you for allowing me to grow closer to You!"

With that in mind, obviously there are several different ways to do this. The best way is to spend time in His Word! My favorite way is via EMAIL! I know crazy right? The first thing I do when I get up in the morning is read my email and every day I receive a passage of Scripture emailed directly to me. If you go to  http://www.bibleplan.org  you can customize your own daily reading plan. I always leave the email in my inbox until I get it read. I love it - you will have to check it out! 

Another one I really enjoy using is http://www.esvbible.org. I like the clear cut website - I use it for searching for Bible passages for my blogging too. There are devotional plans that you can set up so it will go to the next day automatically.

And of course there are other Bible devotionals written by man that would be wonderful ADDITIONAL resources that can greatly enhance your spiritual growth. Some that I have truly been amazed at how God has used them to shape and grow me are "Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World," "Loving God with All Your Mind" and "Me, Myself, and Lies."

A resource that I have used in the past is this "It's Personal" Daily Journal. It's a $15, 90-day devotional guide that I found very helpful. It uses 5 different forms of communication with God. If you are interested in truly jump starting your devotional life this would be a great resource! I must warn you though - it takes TIME to fill it out but trust me, it definitely grows you closer to God if you put forth the effort. 

Here is a picture I took of my journal - this was given to me several years ago so it make have changed a bit in appearance but they don't seem to have any other pictures on the website so I thought I would help you out with that! 

Those are a few ideas to get you going! Whatever you decide to do - do it for His glory! He wants to spend time with His child because like any "Parent" He loves you very very much.  

What have you decided to plan out for your spiritual journey this year? Please share in the comments below!

GIVEAWAY!

I contacted the makers of "It's Personal Daily Journal" and they gave me a free journal just for you! So if this journal piqued your interest but you're not sure if you want to plunge in and buy it,

leave a comment below with the title of your favorite devotional

(the Bible is fine but I'm thinking OTHER book ;0) ) and you just might win one!

If you don't want to wait use this code:

FREE SHIPPING - A9ZV3698LSJJ

Make sure you check back this week because I'm explaining a lot of ways to Organize Your Year! 

In HIS Grip, 

               

Daddy Daughter Smiles

Daddy is causing this smile!

 My youngest, Emily, is infatuated with her daddy. She can be having a terrible, teething, crabby, fussy, no good day and as soon as daddy walks into her world - all of her worries and concerns fall away.

She does not do this for her mommy however. She loves mommy and I get the smiles and coos and lovings just like a mommy should from her baby. But compared to the smiles and coos that her daddy receives? You would think that mommy was dirt. Her face lights up like a blinking beacon to her daddy. None of my other children did this in this extreme to either one of us before Emily came along. 

Today I was holding my little sweetheart (of course she's still my sweetheart!) and I got a giant huge smile from her and we were giggling and playing and having fun together. And I was thinking to myself how precious it is that Emily looks to her daddy in that way. I may be slightly, a little, okay a LOT jealous of their relationship but I'm glad they have it. 

I was contemplating their relationship and that familiar still small voice whispered to me and said 

"I wish you would desire such a relationship with ME as you do with your daughter." 

This daddy loves his little girl! 

Then it was gone. But the words are forever burned into my heart. Even as I write this, my tears are flowing because I know these are true:

God wants me to look at HIM with adoration.

God wants me to forget all of my cares and concerns when I look to HIM. 

God wants me to reach for HIM when I want to play. 

God wants me to be overjoyed when HE does something amazing.

God wants me to spend time with HIM. 

Because He feels that same way about me. 

Have you spent time with your "Daddy" today? He wants to spend time with you! 

In HIS Grip, 

               

I am linked up with: 

        

Hypocrisy in Our Churches

Churches in the mid-west are usually small and attendance is often irregular. If you ask a person on the street what they think of church, God or even Christianity - the answers often suggest they don't know or care or they feel strongly about not going to church because of the hypocrisy that "lives" there. We just finished Vacation Bible School in our new church and I was amazed and even shocked at how little the kids knew about God or the Bible. One night I taught the Ten Commandments. NONE of the 12 kids had ever heard of them.

So why are these kids completely ignorant of God's Word? Why do their parents have no interest in coming or even bringing their children to church? If you ask people why they don't come to church you will come across this blanket statement. "Church is full of HYPOCRITES." The sad thing is that they may be right. Hypocrisy is rampant in our churches across America - but here in the mid-west, it's casting the church into the shadows. But is it really hypocrisy? Or is the root problem something more basic? Something simpler?

 SIN

Sin - specifically PRIDE, self-pity, and deceitfulness. What happens when we sin? What happens after? 

 We hide.

From the beginning of time, from the beginning of sin's existence on earth we have hidden as a result of the guilt our sin produces. 

"And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden." Genesis 3:8

Hiding our sin is a product of the terrible sin nature that we were born carrying. You don't have to teach a child how to hide after doing something wrong. It comes NATURALLY! As we grow older and as others exemplify this hiding or covering up our sin, we become more and more of a professional at hiding who we really are.

Recently my husband (I'm married to my pastor!) asked this question in one of our church services: "What do the unsaved expect from true Christians?" There were responses about being good and not sinning, the necessity of having a good testimony. That's what we've been taught. But it's only PARTLY true!

People know if you are a fake. They can sense it. They despise falseness and hypocrisy. And where do they see it the most? In those who claim to follow a holy God. In those who claim to walk in the footsteps of Jesus. They see that we might be following Jesus but they also see us missing a step or two or three. . . and then we try to cover it up and hide that we fail, hide that we fall, hide that we are not as Christlike as we should be.

"Beware of practicing your righteousness before other people in order to be seen by them, for then you will have no reward from your Father who is in heaven. " Matthew 6:1

We know and the unsaved know and GOD knows that we are not perfect. It's still there - that sin nature. But the difference with children of God? It's what we do AFTER we sin. The good testimony that we need to have before unbelievers is GOING to be contaminated by sin because of that sin nature. Sin is allowed by God for HIS GLORY. When others are aware of our sin it provides OPPORTUNITY to bring glory to God.

We need to be walking this walk following CHRIST and the Bible's definition of following Christ - not our culture's perception of following Christ! 

May my testimony be more about HIM and less about me. 




Note: This post was first published as a guest post on Beautiful Mommy Feet

In His Grip, 

Ann 

The Vicious Cycle of Casting Judgment

Picture a woman sitting in church alone. 

Now picture a woman sitting in church with her husband. 

Now picture a woman sitting in church with her husband and children. 

Now picture a woman sitting in church with her children and no husband. 

When you pictured each one of those pictures you envisioned her situation. Think about it! What judgment calls did you make? What questions popped into your mind? What conclusions did you draw? As women, we are FAMOUS for making these judgment calls and we know that other people make judgment calls about US all the time too! 

Therefore we hide. 

We don't WANT people to know what we really are. So we hide. But guess what - that just makes it WORSE! We create a vicious cycle: 

1. I make a judgment call on someone else. 

2. I realize other people make judgment calls about me. 

3. I hide who I really am. 

4. Because I am hiding something, others must be hiding something too. 

5. I make more judgment calls on someone else. 

6. I hide more about who I really am. 

7. Because I am hiding more. . . 

By judging others, we create a hypocrite in ourselves. We cast judgment on others when it is not our job to do that.  

"Do not judge by appearances, but judge with right judgment.” John 7:24

Photo Credit: Salvatore Vuono

We need to recognize our own judgment upon other people. When we are thinking about someone else do the thoughts take a negative turn? Why? Is it based on truth? Do you truly know that thought is a TRUE fact? If you know it is true, is that thought bringing honor to the person it is about? Is it bringing honor to YOU? If you haven't caught on yet, I am referring to Philippians 4:8 which says: 

"Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things." Philippians 4:8

 Every thought of judgment (every thought period really!) needs to be put through the filter of this verse. Whenever I have a thought of judgment towards someone else most of the time it never gets through the truth filter before I realize that I should not be thinking those judging thoughts. Sometimes though it does get through the true filter but I promise you I have NEVER gone farther than the honor factor. 

Put your thoughts of judgment through the Philippians Filter and you can stop the vicious cycle of casting judgment in your own life - which in turn may stop someone else from doing it too! 

In His Grip, 

Ann

I am linked up with: 

Who Are YOU Trying to Please?

I’m a pretty self-conscious runner. In fact, I don’t even like saying THAT because I am NOT a runner. Every time I do run, I’m extremely aware of what people are thinking about me. And we all know, that if we’re too busy looking around to see what people are thinking about us while we run, we are sure to trip up every time. But if we are too worried and thinking about what people who are watching us run are thinking, we will fail to run a good race.

“Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, 

but only one receives the prize? 

So run that you may obtain it.” 

1 Corinthians 9:24

Pleasing man has been tripping people up for centuries! The Pharisees were famous for doing it. 

“…for they loved the praise of men more than the praise of God.” John 12:43

Jesus’ disciple Peter did it, Martha did it, Hannah did it, Job did it, and countless others including ourselves do it. When we seek to please men or earn their praise, we trip up and stumble. . .

I'm excited to be guest writing for Homemaker's Challenge today! So if you would like to read the rest of this post - head on over and check it out!

In HIS Grip,

Serving in the Church - Too Much or Not Enough?

As believers, we are all given spiritual gifts. Things that we love, things we enjoy, things that we are good at doing in service for God. When we do those things, God blesses our ministry in amazing ways. My gift is exhortation - basically a fancy way of giving advice or counsel or mentoring. It is where I see God working the most in my life. When I let God use my gift I sense the Holy Spirit guiding and directing my words and using what I say to truly encourage and uplift people. It's exciting to see! I love it! 

We all have spiritual gifts and there are many believers who are often confused about what their spiritual gift or gifts are. Chip Ingram has done an amazing series on spiritual gifts that are available as podcasts entitled: "Your Divine Design" or you can read the sermon notes here that include a definition of the different gifts. 

Having gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, let us use them (Romans 12:6 ESV)

Unfortunately, I think there are a lot of people in the church who feel as though if there is a place in the church that is lacking, that we need to STEP UP and FILL IT UP with ourselves. WHETHER WE ARE GIFTED FOR THAT POSITION OR NOT. But you know what happens? Then that place is filled up with someone not gifted for the task. It's just filled. 

 Allow me to illustrate this further by using two women who may be just like you! 

Cindy is truly gifted in hospitality. She loves to have people in her home and get to know people and encourage them by having them in her home. In the Body of Christ, God uses her as a wonderful, vibrant "welcoming face" in the church. She makes people and visitors feel at home in the church, she assists them in finding the appropriate classes, she talks to them when they are standing by themselves, and she welcomes them to other services or even to a meal at her home. 

 For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned. (Romans 12:3 ESV)

One Sunday as Cindy was welcoming visitors, she realized that there needed to be a Sunday School class for the 2 and 3 year olds. The nursery was crowded and the 4 and 5 year olds were dominating the younger age class. No one else is doing anything about the problem so Cindy decided to talk to the Pastor about starting the class. Pastor, believing that this must be something that was laid on Cindy's heart, agreed. So Cindy started teaching the class.

For as in one body we have many members, and the members do not all have the same function, so we, though many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another. Romans 12:4-5 

Unbeknownst to both Pastor and Cindy was Trudy. Trudy had been fighting an inner battle with the Holy Spirit. She has the gift of teaching and she knows that there is a need for a children's teacher but she keeps holding back because if she did start teaching she knows she would have to give up sleeping in on Sunday mornings. She would have to get up earlier to make sure that she was completely prepared to teach. The Holy Spirit had been working greatly in her heart but all of a sudden, Cindy started to teach the class and now Trudy can go back to sleeping in on Sundays and not using her gift - guilt free. 

For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive what is due for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil.

(2 Corinthians 5:10 ESV)

Cindy is not gifted in teaching the class and the little kids end up simply being babysat and taught a few songs. Cindy quickly gets frustrated with the situation and resents teaching the class. Not only that, but because she is now teaching, her gift of hospitality is not being used as it was before. She can no longer greet visitors as soon as they come in because she is busy using the copier or attending teacher's meetings. Suddenly instead of simply lacking a children's teacher, the church now lacks a children's teacher AND someone with a hospitable heart to make people feel at home in the church. 

So where are you? How do you fit in? Are you a Trudy? Are you serving the church with your gifts? Or are you fighting an inner battle with the Holy Spirit and not wanting to do what God wants you to do?

Or are you like Cindy? Are you stepping in wherever you see an area that is lacking? Are you ROBBING someone of being able to fill the place where THEY are most gifted? And in so doing, are you not completing your position in the Body of Christ that has your name on it? 

If you think this may be going on, I encourage you to talk to your pastor and see about serving where God has gifted you the most. Trust me, your pastor may know exactly where you really are gifted and can help guide you! 

In HIS Grip, 

               

  

I Just Wanna Be a Sheep. . . Or NOT!

Do you know this song?

It's a cute kids song and my kids love it and I love to sing it with them but you know, here's the thing. I'm not sure that God necessarily WANTS us to be like sheep. 

For a few years my family - okay my sister and I - raised baby lambs that were rejected by their mommies. And I do NOT want to be a sheep for SEVERAL reasons. 

1. They are STINKY and DIRTY! Maybe not as bad as pigs or chickens but they do have quite the odor! All of those cute sweet little pictures of white fleeced sheep - the only time I EVER saw a completely WHITE sheep was when it was a brand new baby who had not been in the barn yet. But consider this: 

We have all become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous deeds are like a polluted garment. Isaiah 64:6

2. They are STUPID! A sheep will truly seek the grass on the other side of the fence and use any and all means possible to get to that grass if they see a possibility. Many times I would come upon a sheep trying to push against a fence or getting their head completely caught in a fence or stuck in between a fence trying to get the "whatever" it was they wanted on the other side of the fence when everything they needed - food, water, safety, protection was already provided for them inside the fence and did not exist on the outside of the fence. Consider this: 

All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned—every one—to his own way; and the Lord has laid on him the iniquity of us all. Isaiah 53:6

3. They are NOT GOOD SHEPHERD FOLLOWERS! People often think that the sheep just simply follow the shepherd. NOT SO.  They follow whoever or whatever fancies them! They will follow the sheep in front of them. They will follow a dog. They will follow that patch of grass or that sniff of something. If the "head" sheep veers off somewhere so does the entire passle of them! When I wanted my sheep to come to me or follow me, it took CONTINUAL calling and HEARING MY VOICE (or the feed bucket!) to make them truly follow me. Consider this: 

When he has brought out all his own, he goes before them, and the sheep follow him, for they know his voice. John 10:4

My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. John 10: 27

With these things in mind - do YOU want to be a sheep? I know I don't! 

I want to be like the Shepherd!

But I am a sheep. 

I have so much in common with sheep. I am a sinner and sin is disgusting to God. I fall so short in my own wisdom and understanding. I seek things that are not good for me and I seek things that are not what God wants for me. I forget to follow Christ. It takes a constant redirect from the Holy Spirit to lead me. 

Teach me your way, O Lord, and lead me on a level path because of my enemies. Psalm 27:11

So next time you hear the song about just wanting to be a sheep remember, if you are a believer and a child of God - you already ARE a sheep and you should be striving to be more like the Shepherd!  

In HIS Grip, 

               

Guest Posting for Beautiful Mommy Feet!

Today I am guest posting for Melissa at Beautiful Mommy Feet! Her blog has been a blessing to me and has truly resonated in my heart! This Pastor's wife has quickly become one of my "bloggy" friends and I've enjoyed getting to know her better! She asked me to write about Cultural Christianity and to be honest, this task stretched me in ways I did not expect when I told her "yes!" I learned a lot and God really led me in writing this - here is a little snippet! For the rest you will have to head on over to Beautiful Mommy Feet!

Churches in the mid-west are usually small and attendance is often irregular. If you ask a person on the street what they think of church, God or even Christianity - the answers often suggest they don't know or care or they feel strongly about not going to church because of the hypocrisy that "lives" there. We just finished Vacation Bible School in our new church and I was amazed and even shocked at how little the kids knew about God or the Bible. One night I taught the Ten Commandments. NONE of the 12 kids had ever heard of them.

So why are these kids completely ignorant of God's Word? Why do their parents have no interest in coming or even bringing their children to church? If you ask people why they don't come to church you will come across this blanket statement...

For the rest of today's post head on over! Thanks for stopping!


In HIS Grip, 
               

WARNING Signs are EVERYWHERE!!! HELP!

Have you ever noticed how many WARNING signs there are on things? They are ALLLLLL OVER!!! They seriously irritate me. Especially the foolish ones. Like this. 

I would REALLY like to know exactly WHY I am supposed to supervise this thing all day. I have enough to do with watching my kids much less their TOYS!!! 

And uh-oh! Emily fell asleep on it the other day! I'm definitely going to jail for THAT one! 

And while my child is being used, I cannot leave her unattended. Ookaaay??? 

You have to question these "Cautions" don't you? Why are they REALLY there? Is it for my child's safety? Well since they are okay with me USING my child - I somewhat doubt it. (Yes, I know that's not what they MEANT! but that is what it SAYS!)  Let's face it - there are a TON of warning signs out there that are not for the benefit of the reader of the warning sign. They are for the benefit of the WRITER! The person or company who put the WARNING sign out there in the first place! Gone are the days of people selflessly putting out a sign so they can avoid the same thing happening to someone else. Now we are cautioned against foolishness so we cannot BLAME someone else. How ridiculous is this? 

We have suddenly become a culture that believes it is okay if not completely ACCEPTABLE to BLAME others for our own foolishness or sin. 

We blame our parents for not raising us properly. 

We blame our government for messing up society. 

We blame our pain on the doctor. 

We blame our medicine for making us crabby and angry.

We blame our lack of sleep for our rotten attitudes. 

We blame GOD for the evil in the world. 

Wait a minute back up here. What are we doing blaming GOD? He is the one who gave us the REAL warnings! 

God gave us God's Word so we would read the warnings that will protect us. The warnings like 

"the wages of sin is death" - Rom 5:8 

God will reward according to your works - Rom 2:6

 the book of Proverbs contains NUMEROUS warnings for fools and children and parents. 

and COUNTLESS others.

We receive warnings every day from man - mail, internet, facebook, our toys, books, shoes, you name it - it most likely has a warning SOMEWHERE! If not attached to it - you can most likely find a warning online! 

So what do we do with the warnings from God? Sometimes we do the same things to His Word! We may not throw it in the trash but we see it and don't read it. We put it aside or store it away or ignore it completely. 

But these warnings are FROM GOD!!! He wants us to read them! They are truly for our GOOD and HIS glory! How many warnings do we see in every day life that are truly for our benefit? How many warnings are there that are truly for God's GLORY? 

Today's post is linked up with these wonderful blogs! 

Life in Our Fishbowl: My Quiet Time

Since God has given me a new passion and desire to serve Him with my blogging, it has become more difficult to manage my time online wisely. So I decided to sell my netbook and purchase an Archos 7o Android Tablet. Problem solved! What? That's what my husband said too!

There are many things that I love about it. My number one thing is I can be anywhere and use it. I can bring it upstairs with me and use my Google reader to catch up on blogs and be right there with my kids making sure they are staying in their beds to take their naps and not galavanting about their bedrooms! I can nurse my baby and one-handedly check email or read from my Kindle app. I call those times "dead times" or times when I am only doing ONE thing! Now I can multi-task in those "dead times" and make them no longer "dead!"

My favorite thing though? I use it as my Bible. Yup, that's right! And I LOVE IT! There are SEVERAL Bible apps that are wonderful. I have ESV Bible app that I like to use but my favorite app is Cadre Bible. It's free unless you want to upgrade it to get different Bibles and resources.

Since my hubbie is a PASTOR, I sit in the pew alone. Ha Ha Ha! I just reread what I wrote! I don't sit in the pew ALONE! I have a 4 year old, a two year old and a 3 month old to keep me company! Now do you see why I feel ALONE? I don't have any help from my husband who is usually lending a helping hand, or lap as it were. So opening my Bible and following along with my pastor-husband is a dream. I am usually holding Emily and wrapping my other arm around my 2 year old to remind him of MOMMY'S AWESOME PRESENCE in his life. Right.

My Archos changed that. All of a sudden I can open my Bible and with one hand scroll through the verses as quickly as if I had my Bible with me. I can READ it! And hold my baby! And wiggle my finger accompanied by my "meanest mommy reminder" look at my son or daughter.

Before I got my Archos, I had daily Bible readings that I picked out emailed to me by www.mybibleplans.com/ and I LOVE it! I especially love it because I can read them while I'm sitting in the bathroom - I didn't say I was the one going!! :0)

Media can make it VERY difficult to focus on time with God but this time for me, it helped me GET my time with God and I'm so thankful!

Oh and by the way! Be watching for my new series about Life in OTHER Fishbowls! And if you are a pastor's wife who would like to be involved in giving us a peek into your fishbowl let me know!

I'm linked up with Courtney at Women Living Well today for her Media Monday series!

Are Your Glasses Crystal Clear?

We moved into our home (a.k.a. The Parsonage) and QUICKLY discovered we had hard water. It was unbelievable! I washed the dishes in our dishwasher 3 times and my glasses were suddenly WHITE! My plastic bowls, my Tupperware, my kids cups, even my SILVERWARE took on a dingy white color. I had NEVER seen anything like it!

I researched online different ways that you could fight the hard water and I ended up using vinegar as a rinse agent - it helped but it was still a major problem! Then I tried finding citric acid - the only thing I found was "Fresh Fruit." That helped even more but you still couldn't really SEE through my glasses. Then I finally found pure Citric Acid and that helped even better. One day I was shopping and I found a product called "Lemi-Shine." I decided to try it because my dishes were still not perfection. That was the best! It worked pretty well! I was satisfied. I thought.

Then our clothes started having problems. My husband put on a new white shirt dress shirt on top of his white T-shirts and I was shocked. His white T-shirt was UNSIGHTLY! I decided enough was enough and I called the water softener people. I compared prices and got 2 dealers fighting over me - it was GREAT! But that's another story. Within a few days I had soft water.

Once again I was SHOCKED! The dishes that I was happy and content about - they were SPARKLING! I had NO IDEA they could be that clean! It's been about a week and I'm STILL picking up my glasses and looking at them up in the light! This morning I was doing this and all of a sudden I heard a still small voice telling me "you could be cleaner too." Just like that and it was gone. I started thinking. My glasses were all dirty and cloudy but I was satisfied with them. I thought they were good enough. But if you were to compare the before and after pictures of my glasses, I would not have been satisfied and I was shocked that I WAS satisfied with the state of my dishes.

The condition of my spiritual life is exactly the same! Job 13:23a says:

"How many are my iniquities and my sins?"

How much dirtiness do we see in ourselves? Do we see all of it? Not at all! Because of the sin nature, sin is ALWAYS there! We will never be free of it until we are in heaven. God reveals sin in our lives when He decides that its time to clean that up! The rest of Job 13:23 says this:

"Make me know my transgression and my sin."

When God brings up that little "issue" to our attention, He wants us to fix it! He wants us to understand our sin and how dirty it makes us to Him. Until we see the righteousness and holiness of God and compare it to ourselves, we will not know the extent of our filth. 

Psalm 139:23-24

Search me, O God, and know my heart!Try me and know my thoughts!

 And see if there be any grievous way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting!

In my own life, when God reveals the sin I have in my heart - I become sad but then relieved. Suddenly, I know my problem and I can seek God to give me the help that I need. That may seem strange that I am glad my sin is confronting me but its true! I can only conquer my sin if I have the help from God and I know that He will give me the endurance to fight the fight for a cleaner, more sanctified me. 

Life In Our Fishbowl: Plastic People

Photo Credit

In the three months since that I have been a pastor's wife something never ceases to amaze me. Women talk to me! It's INCREDIBLE! I LOVE it! Now before you start thinking that nobody liked to talk to me before I was a pastor's wife, let me explain. Women really talk to me and they let me SEE inside. They open up their hearts and they tell me their stories - stories about when they became a Christian, stories of past struggles, stories of grace and forgiveness, stories of pain and loss. It's a beautiful thing to hear these stories and be able to listen and cry and encourage and build up these women. 

My husband and I have often talked about the "Stained Glass Masquerade" that happens in churches everywhere. People hide what is truly in their hearts and in so doing, no one can help them. But at the same time, no one can hurt them more.

How beautiful would it be if everyone could go to church and be themselves completely. How beautiful it would be if you could go to church and everyone would love you and encourage you and help you with your deepest darkest struggles. If church could really truly be the safe house that it is meant to be, how would it change our lives? I think it would be monumental!

So how do we make a change in our churches? How do we help our churches become a place where we can take off the mask and be ourselves? Let people into our lives? When you look at the overall picture, it is impossible. We cannot simply hold a world-wide - "Let's all Take Off Our Mask Sunday!"

It starts with individuals. I may be a pastor's wife that is expected to BE a certain type of Christian, a certain type of mother, and wife. But if I let people in to realize that I am just a woman, a sinful woman struggling with sin in my heart just like ANYONE else out there, it allows for people to have HOPE. The more I share of my insides and how I need to grow and how I have already grown, the more others realize that they too can have that! By being REAL and honest it gives HOPE to others!

Being a pastor's wife creates an environment for women to feel safe to talk to me. I love that because I have a heart for encouraging women. I am so thankful that God has chosen me to have that role. But maybe you are not a pastor's wife and there is someone in your life that you need to talk to, someone that you need to encourage by telling them your story. Someone that is struggling in their life and may not know that you struggled with the same things. Pray about it and see if God wants you to be that person to step in and say "I know how you feel because I've felt it too." Then it won't be just your pastor's wife who that person feels that they can turn to. 

Life In Our Fishbowl: Accepting Help

I like independence. I believe even though I am a wife and mom that I'm still a pretty independent person. I don't necessarily think this is a good or a bad thing. At least for me. I think it's great that I do things on my own and I don't normally ask for help. Well. . . then I became a pastor's wife. Now someone else is mowing our yard, taking care of the flooding in our basement and a teenager in our church was "hired" to be our monthly date night babysitter! Now OBVIOUSLY I'm NOT complaining! This is GREAT! Really! To not have to worry about these things and enjoy these things are not where I struggle. 

It's my PRIDE about my independence that I'm worried about! My husband was gone pretty much all week last week and a sweet older woman in her 80's (!!!!) felt that she should have gone with me to the doctor's office with me to help with my kids. The thing holding her back was that she has a broken arm and has been struggling with dizziness. BLESS. HER. HEART! She's AMAZING!!!! 

I was telling my sister (aka my best friend) about these things and of course what are sisters for but to point out our weaknesses right? My sister seems to think so! But then, what she said struck a nerve and I knew instantly that she was right. She told me that I need to learn to accept help. Because I need it. Because I don't HAVE to do it all on my own. 

So what was the REAL root of my problem? I'll say it again! PRIDE!!!! I seem to think that I am EXPECTED to do it all on my own. Either by my own standards or by that invisible "THEY" that we always seem to care about but no one really KNOWS! We perceive that independence is necessary but when it comes down to it - God doesn't promote independence whatsoever!! I searched the Bible (ESV) for the terms independence and independent and wasn't expecting to find anything but guess what it IS there! 

I Corinthians 11:11 "Nevertheless, in the Lord woman is not independent of man nor man of woman;"

HEY!!! Talk about knife into my heart! Read the context of the passage and it's even more obvious! But then look through the Bible at the emphasis on fellowship and helping each other. Paul alone was helped in so numerous ways - just look at all of the "thank you" notes he sent! It's a biblical principle to help each other and be helped and to be THANKFUL for the help and not concerned with our own pride! 

Maybe I can do it - but maybe that's not the plan that God has designed for me! Maybe He wants to bless me by using someone to help me. I'll never know that blessing until I admit that I do truly need help!

Do you want to help your pastor's wife (or anyone else for that matter!) but don't know how to do it? Have a heart-to-heart with her and let her know that God has given you a desire to help her and her family and give her your ideas of how you can help her and let her choose which would fit her life the best! Please don't just say "Let me know if you need any help!" because trust me, she probably won't! Provide tangible thought out ideas because that helps her know that you truly DO want to help! 

Life in Our Fishbowl: Perceptions

Perceptions. Our world is THICK with perceptions. My hubbie and I have been talking about this concept for the past few days (that happens when your hubbie preaches about it on Sunday!). My entire life, I always perceived specific things of my pastor's family. And now that I AM the mom in a pastor's family, those ideas are STILL there! It's true! 

Now, I know, that we are normal people. VERY "NORMAL." But it's always at the back of my mind that there are several things that I "need to make sure that my family accomplishes" because its expected. Like my children should sit still in church and NEVER run in the church. And my house should ALWAYS be cleaned in case company pops over. And I should NEVER be in my pajamas after 9:00am. Goes along with the company thing. Yes, I'm still in my pajamas! 

Then there are the perceptions that I think I should DO. Things that I expect out of myself. These are the ones that I put on my own shoulders. Things like taking my kids outside every day the sun shines, or having my son potty trained before he turns 3, or making sure there are amazing meals on the table three times a day, or being a size 8 (yea, so NOT there!) It's EXHAUSTING! 

Well my hubbie switched roles yesterday and became my pastor to me and God used his words mightily in my heart. Who says that I need to be be be be be . . . . ? Who says? It's definitely NOT the Bible. So then it's definitely NOT God. Then who is it? It's ME. It's not even other PEOPLE! Now they might imply things and slip in little comments that were meant to direct you into the "right way that you should go." But it's ME who decides to impose the perception into my life. It's my decision to take responsibility for the perception. 

Now I am NOT saying that we should drop the perceptions and do whatever trips our fancy. There are good reasons for those perceptions. Using the lens of the Bible we need to evaluate our perceptions to see if they match up to GOD'S PERCEPTIONS. Our ideas are meaningless unless they are the same as God's. What does God think of my endeavors to keep a spotless house? What does God think of my endeavors to keep my children sitting like statues in the church services? What does God think of my endeavors to. . . ? 

Now obviously Pastor's families are not the only ones who have perceptions thrown at them every day. Think of the president of the United States or Prince Will and Kate - I felt like they were a WALKING EXAMPLE of a couple trying to fulfill a MULTITUDE of perceptions. But now think of the expectations of moms, dads, children, parents, grandparents, sisters, brothers. We all have ideas of what they should be like. But what REALLY matters is what GOD wants us to be. 

So how do we take this and grow from it? We need to examine our heart and our lives and ask God "What do YOU have for me today? What do YOU expect from me today? How can I follow YOUR perceptions for my life today?" God has a plan for each and every one of us and sometimes what we THINK we should be doing is NOT a part of God's plan even though it may be on the to-do list of everyone else out there. Psalm 37 says: 

3 Trust in the Lord, and do good;
dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness. [2]
4 Delight yourself in the Lord,
and he will give you the desires of your heart.

5 Commit your way to the Lord;
trust in him, and he will act.
6 He will bring forth your righteousness as the light,
and your justice as the noonday.

7 Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him;

We are responsible for following God's path and committing our paths to GOD not to what our culture or our peers or even our own desires seem to be leading and guiding us to do. Trust God and it will all be beautiful. 

And search your own heart to see if maybe you are pushing your own perceptions on someone else. Maybe you are judging someone for something based on your own ideas. And once again, pray for your pastor's family or anyone else who is responsible for others well-being that they will be able to follow God and not man. 

Thanks for peering into our fishbowl today!