Serving in the Church - Too Much or Not Enough?

As believers, we are all given spiritual gifts. Things that we love, things we enjoy, things that we are good at doing in service for God. When we do those things, God blesses our ministry in amazing ways. My gift is exhortation - basically a fancy way of giving advice or counsel or mentoring. It is where I see God working the most in my life. When I let God use my gift I sense the Holy Spirit guiding and directing my words and using what I say to truly encourage and uplift people. It's exciting to see! I love it! 

We all have spiritual gifts and there are many believers who are often confused about what their spiritual gift or gifts are. Chip Ingram has done an amazing series on spiritual gifts that are available as podcasts entitled: "Your Divine Design" or you can read the sermon notes here that include a definition of the different gifts. 

Having gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, let us use them (Romans 12:6 ESV)

Unfortunately, I think there are a lot of people in the church who feel as though if there is a place in the church that is lacking, that we need to STEP UP and FILL IT UP with ourselves. WHETHER WE ARE GIFTED FOR THAT POSITION OR NOT. But you know what happens? Then that place is filled up with someone not gifted for the task. It's just filled. 

 Allow me to illustrate this further by using two women who may be just like you! 

Cindy is truly gifted in hospitality. She loves to have people in her home and get to know people and encourage them by having them in her home. In the Body of Christ, God uses her as a wonderful, vibrant "welcoming face" in the church. She makes people and visitors feel at home in the church, she assists them in finding the appropriate classes, she talks to them when they are standing by themselves, and she welcomes them to other services or even to a meal at her home. 

 For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned. (Romans 12:3 ESV)

One Sunday as Cindy was welcoming visitors, she realized that there needed to be a Sunday School class for the 2 and 3 year olds. The nursery was crowded and the 4 and 5 year olds were dominating the younger age class. No one else is doing anything about the problem so Cindy decided to talk to the Pastor about starting the class. Pastor, believing that this must be something that was laid on Cindy's heart, agreed. So Cindy started teaching the class.

For as in one body we have many members, and the members do not all have the same function, so we, though many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another. Romans 12:4-5 

Unbeknownst to both Pastor and Cindy was Trudy. Trudy had been fighting an inner battle with the Holy Spirit. She has the gift of teaching and she knows that there is a need for a children's teacher but she keeps holding back because if she did start teaching she knows she would have to give up sleeping in on Sunday mornings. She would have to get up earlier to make sure that she was completely prepared to teach. The Holy Spirit had been working greatly in her heart but all of a sudden, Cindy started to teach the class and now Trudy can go back to sleeping in on Sundays and not using her gift - guilt free. 

For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive what is due for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil.

(2 Corinthians 5:10 ESV)

Cindy is not gifted in teaching the class and the little kids end up simply being babysat and taught a few songs. Cindy quickly gets frustrated with the situation and resents teaching the class. Not only that, but because she is now teaching, her gift of hospitality is not being used as it was before. She can no longer greet visitors as soon as they come in because she is busy using the copier or attending teacher's meetings. Suddenly instead of simply lacking a children's teacher, the church now lacks a children's teacher AND someone with a hospitable heart to make people feel at home in the church. 

So where are you? How do you fit in? Are you a Trudy? Are you serving the church with your gifts? Or are you fighting an inner battle with the Holy Spirit and not wanting to do what God wants you to do?

Or are you like Cindy? Are you stepping in wherever you see an area that is lacking? Are you ROBBING someone of being able to fill the place where THEY are most gifted? And in so doing, are you not completing your position in the Body of Christ that has your name on it? 

If you think this may be going on, I encourage you to talk to your pastor and see about serving where God has gifted you the most. Trust me, your pastor may know exactly where you really are gifted and can help guide you! 

In HIS Grip, 

               

  

Life In Our Fishbowl: When the Pastor's Wife Misses Church

Sunday morning I was on top of my game. By 8:45 am I had lunch going in the crockpot, breakfast cleaned up, 2 out of 3 kids dressed for church and I was even dressed and ready to walk the fifty feet over to go to church. I just had to wake up my oldest and get her ready in the next 20 minutes. Easy peasy.

Then it happened. 

She woke up and threw up. 

Okaaaay. . . 

All of a sudden this entire pastor's family would not be going to church today. Except for the pastor. And I dreaded telling him. You see, any time that I cannot be there to hear my hubbie preach or even just be in the building in the nursery, it is hard on my man. I am the one person that he can look at and he can know is 100% rooting for him and praying for him. I'm in his corner. It doesn't mean that there are not other people that are doing that, it's just that he knows I am for sure. 

But this Sunday was even more important that I be there. This Sunday several people from my hubbie's part-time workplace and their families were visiting church that morning to surprise my hubbie. And I couldn't be there. Now, just so you understand, I don't HAVE to be there for my hubbie to do a great job as a Pastor. God has that covered. But if you could see my hubbie's face whenever I have to tell him that someone is sick and I can't be there at church today - you would understand. It's like I am missing the big promotion dinner or something. 

So when my little girl woke up and threw up, I was heart broken. "Lord! Not today! Lord, don't You know!  This is going to be a somewhat stressful Sunday for my hubbie! All of those people saved and unsaved walking into church to hear my hubbie preach for the first time! I need to be there to encourage him!" But then I knew that this is all part of His plan and I my plan doesn't have to mesh with His plan, in fact, my plans should always be thrown out and be replaced by His. So I whispered an apology to the Lord for my attitude and I shifted gears. If I can't be there, I will do what I need to do with prayers for my hubbie from a distance. Since I was all dressed and ready to go I settled my sickie onto the couch with a video and walked over to the church to tell my hubbie the dreaded news and to drop my son off at his Sunday School class. Then it happened. God took the reins for me. 

A sweetheart in our church offered to go over to my house and watch my kids so I could be there for the service. What? I almost naturally refused because of COURSE I wasn't going to let someone else risk getting sick by watching my kids! But then I could hear that familiar still small voice telling me to accept this offer. So I did. And I went to the service and I met the families that were visiting and I heard my hubbie's sermon. Just like regular a Sunday to anyone else. But this one was special to me because I was there right where God wanted me to be. 

Next time you see that your Pastor's wife is sick or can't be there for some reason, say a little prayer for her husband, because most likely, your prayers are joining hers. 

In HIS Grip, 

               

Raising Mighty Arrows Guest Post

Guess what! I am not the ONLY one who emphasizes Pastor's wives on Monday! Heather at Raising Mighty Arrows is a fellow Pastor's wife and she has a heart for those of us serving alongside our Ministry hubbies. She has Minister's Wife Mondays and I wrote a guest post for this series! Here is a little precursor but you will have to hop on over there to read the rest! 

Room At the Cross for You

Room at the Cross for Pastor's Wives

It was Sunday morning worship and the service was drawing to a close. My pastor was giving an invitation asking those who needed to strengthen their relationship with God to come forward and make it public. My heart was heavy and God was speaking to my heart and I knew I must make a change in my life. 

But... going forward? “That’s hard Lord! I can’t do that! Everyone will see me!! It was always hard to go forward before but NOW? I am the PASTOR’S WIFE!!!...

For the rest - head on over to Raising Mighty Arrows! 

In HIS Grip, 
               

Prep Your Heart for the Pastor's Sermon Today!

I came across this post on TrueWoman.com and I HAD to share it with you! Here is a little blip from Nancy Leigh DeMoss' post entitled "How to Get the Most Out of Your Pastor's Preaching."

"Do you ever find yourself . . .
• waking up on Sunday morning and wishing you didn’t have to go to church?
• having a hard time staying awake in church?
• daydreaming during the message, or making a mental “to-do” list while the pastor is preaching?
• picking apart the message or the preacher in your mind or not getting anything out of the sermon?
• wishing your pastor would be more _____?
• forgetting what the message was about before you get home from church?
If we’re not benefitting from the ministry of the Word as it is publicly proclaimed in our local churches, the fault may not lie in the one proclaiming the Word. It may lie in our readiness to hear, receive, and respond to the Word.
How can you prepare your heart to get the most out of your pastor’s preaching?"

Head on over to TrueWoman.com to continue reading this post.


In HIS Grip, 
               

Mother Daughter Banquet

Soooo. . . I'm a pastor's wife, right? And pastor's wives are asked to do a variety of things that otherwise they wouldn't be asked to do. I was asked by an area church to speak at their Mother Daughter Banquet last night and I was completely honored to do that. I had done it before but only to ladies that already knew me. I only knew ONE person in this audience. But I have to say, I had a BLAST! It was so much fun to do and I was very excited to do it. But let me tell you, I do not envy my hubby having to get up and speak three sometimes even four times a week. It's exhausting!!!

In the past I've spoken for various ladies events and youth activities and for my Women's Ministry classes in college and I am SOOOO thankful for those classes and the experience that they gave me. BUT I did NOT have three kids to care for during preparation for my devotionals at that time! Soooo what used to take me a couple of hours or so to pull together now takes more like 5 DAYS to do! Thankfully my hubbie kidnapped two of the three kiddos and that helped me prepare a TON! I love doing it but for more than one reason, I'm glad I'm not the one up there every Sunday speaking like my hubbie!

Calvary Baptist Church Blog

Soooo . . . I've been a little busy CREATING a BLOG for our church!!! YAY! I'm pretty excited about this and can't help but show it off! You're going to HAVE to check it out! My hubbie and I are both contributing authors for it. I'm so excited about it I'm busting! So go for it and take a peek! 

Book Review: Parenting in the Pew by Robbie Castleman

This book was sent to me by God! I'm completely serious! I found this book in a thrift shop in Peoria while shopping with my MIL. I was completely blessed by it! I need to give you some background to our situation. My husband is looking for a church as many of you know and we've been to SEVERAL churches in the past year that are looking for a pastor. I don't know how many of you have ever been in this position but as the wife to the potential pastor, this is DIFFICULT!!! Most of these churches do not have a nursery and even if they do have kids programs, Children's church or a nursery, my kids are too scared to go to them due to the strangeness. So they end up with me wherever I am. As a pastor's wife with her man up in the pulpit it is so hard to have her attention split between her husband and her kids. I truly feel a huge responsibility that I need to be there listening attentively to my husband to encourage him by my presence but also to be the first to praise him following the message (and sometimes but not often offer critique - but I do that part much later!). Our church here at home does not have a nursery or children's church and we have battled learning how to sit still in church every single Sunday we are there. If one kid is sitting still, the other is causing problems or is tired or hungry or SOMETHING or just simply being sinful! (Yes, pastor's families do have this problem too!) Our church is a church plant that is meeting in one room with a restroom. There is nowhere for me to take my children out to be disciplined except to the bathroom but trust me, EVERYONE knows or can hear what's going on in there! I was truly at my wits end about my kids in church. I was ready to stop teaching Sunday School just so someone else could take care of my kids so I could hear at least one message without my kids distracting me completely. I was ready to stop going to church because I simply felt we were such a distraction to others around me. I desire for my kids to sit still and be a blessed part of the worship service but alas it was not happening. So when this book popped out at me with it's 0.25 cent sticker price, I was amazed at how God brings things around for us at exactly the right time (and the right price!). 

Robbie Castleman has done an amazing job at encouraging frustrated moms (and dads) who struggle with discouragement or the desire of not going to church because they don't get anything out of the service for themselves. She attacked that problem head on and adjusted my terrible view of worship and what it's really about. Her first chapter is entitled, "Daddy, I'd like you to meet my children." I did not quite understand at first what she meant by that but later learned that church is about God (duh you may say, but how quickly we seem to forget this when our kids are being naughty in the pew!). We are coming to church because we want to worship and praise Him. It has NOTHING to do with whether or not I am fed spiritually or whether my children are presenting themselves as the model children. She teaches throughout the book that teaching your kids to be a part of the service in small ways can help train your kids to love church and not just tolerate it or have it be the worst 45 minutes of the week because they have to sit still. 

There was a lot in this book that will go far in helping me teach my kids to behave and become a part of the service. But the biggest thing that impacted me was changing my perspective of why I was doing this with my kids. I'm there to worship and to point my kids to worship alongside of me. They still don't sit perfectly still and they talk loudly sometimes during the middle of the sermon, but teaching my kids the joy of pointing to the words in the hymnal or hearing my son praying (loudly I might add) at the same time as the speaker, is really what real worship is all about. 

I can't recommend everything in this book - her theology is unpeggable because she tries to reach out to any and all church systems but she definitely nailed it when it came to worshiping God. I must also say that I don't agree on all counts either because I will probably still use children's church and the nursery on occasion simply because I feel that when my husband becomes the pastor, my first priority is to be a helpmeet to my husband when he needs it. But for now, I'm parenting in the pew and loving it! (most of the time! ;-)  

Growing up in Church

Old pic of Aimee's first steps in church!

I am counting my blessings today. On Sunday my husband and I had the privilege of going to the church that I called home for several years. So many memories flooded back to me of what this church meant to me growing up. God used the ministry of this church to bring my dad into regular church attendance and eventually into ministry. After hearing a message preached about hell there, I became a child of God. I was baptized at this church! I have wonderful friends that still go to this church that I was able to see while we were there!  My Sunday school teachers, my AWANA teachers, my youth group leaders, and so many more were there. I must say that hearing my husband preach in this church was an absolute treasure to me. I feel as though I've gone full circle by going there on Sunday!  This church has totally served me and taught me on and off through about 16 years of my life and if it were not for the ministry of this church, I probably would not be anywhere near to where I am today in my relationship with God. I probably would not be married to a pastor, or be the daughter of a pastor for that matter. My children would probably not be going to church or hearing God's Word for themselves. It amazes me how God can take a small group of people and use their ripple effect to minister and serve so many people. It makes me think, how is my ministry today rippling out and affecting others around me? 

Easter

I love Easter and this Easter seemed to be especially Easterly! :-) Complete with new clothes for church, a wonderful church service, an Easter egg hunt, and fried chicken - it was great! Here are some oh so cute pics from the weekend!

Aimee and Cody are vying for rights to the window so they can peek out at "the Easter Bunny" otherwise known as Daddy hiding the Easter eggs.

The chase and hunt is on!

We traveled to visit family for the weekend and had a picture in our Easter finery!

Even with all of the festivities, I did not find it difficult to forget what the holiday is truly about, the resurrection of my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. I usually watch the movie "The Passion of the Christ" and since we were visiting family over the weekend I missed watching it but a video shown at church was just as powerful in remembering what Jesus did to give me eternal life with Him.