Life In Our Fishbowl: When the Pastor's Wife Misses Church

Sunday morning I was on top of my game. By 8:45 am I had lunch going in the crockpot, breakfast cleaned up, 2 out of 3 kids dressed for church and I was even dressed and ready to walk the fifty feet over to go to church. I just had to wake up my oldest and get her ready in the next 20 minutes. Easy peasy.

Then it happened. 
She woke up and threw up. 

Okaaaay. . . 

All of a sudden this entire pastor's family would not be going to church today. Except for the pastor. And I dreaded telling him. You see, any time that I cannot be there to hear my hubbie preach or even just be in the building in the nursery, it is hard on my man. I am the one person that he can look at and he can know is 100% rooting for him and praying for him. I'm in his corner. It doesn't mean that there are not other people that are doing that, it's just that he knows I am for sure. 

But this Sunday was even more important that I be there. This Sunday several people from my hubbie's part-time workplace and their families were visiting church that morning to surprise my hubbie. And I couldn't be there. Now, just so you understand, I don't HAVE to be there for my hubbie to do a great job as a Pastor. God has that covered. But if you could see my hubbie's face whenever I have to tell him that someone is sick and I can't be there at church today - you would understand. It's like I am missing the big promotion dinner or something. 

So when my little girl woke up and threw up, I was heart broken. "Lord! Not today! Lord, don't You know!  This is going to be a somewhat stressful Sunday for my hubbie! All of those people saved and unsaved walking into church to hear my hubbie preach for the first time! I need to be there to encourage him!" But then I knew that this is all part of His plan and I my plan doesn't have to mesh with His plan, in fact, my plans should always be thrown out and be replaced by His. So I whispered an apology to the Lord for my attitude and I shifted gears. If I can't be there, I will do what I need to do with prayers for my hubbie from a distance. Since I was all dressed and ready to go I settled my sickie onto the couch with a video and walked over to the church to tell my hubbie the dreaded news and to drop my son off at his Sunday School class. Then it happened. God took the reins for me. 

A sweetheart in our church offered to go over to my house and watch my kids so I could be there for the service. What? I almost naturally refused because of COURSE I wasn't going to let someone else risk getting sick by watching my kids! But then I could hear that familiar still small voice telling me to accept this offer. So I did. And I went to the service and I met the families that were visiting and I heard my hubbie's sermon. Just like regular a Sunday to anyone else. But this one was special to me because I was there right where God wanted me to be. 

Next time you see that your Pastor's wife is sick or can't be there for some reason, say a little prayer for her husband, because most likely, your prayers are joining hers. 

In HIS Grip, 


  1. Thank you so much for writing this blog. I'm a baby pastor's wife/homeschooling mama with 4 young ones and I relate so much!

    I'm terrified of the Sunday that comes (hasn't happened yet!) that I cannot be at church because you see, we are a church plant and on any given Sunday morning I set up the hospitality breakfast table, lead worship by singing (alone) and playing my guitar (usually with a pianist), and play back up nursery during the sermon when our nursery worker is out of town (which is 40% of the time). I'm so torn because right now there is no one else to do worship and I want my kiddos to have the liberty of being sick and not have to be drug to church regardless to camp out in daddy's office which I fear would occur. At the very least, without it being a super stressful switch around.

    Thank you for the ministry of this blog - it is so very refreshing to see into the mind of someone who knows my world! God Bless!

  2. Aw...So glad the Lord worked out all the details for you. What a wonderful demonstration of resting in Him. Thanks for sharing!

  3. Wonderful post! There have been a few times when I have had to stay home with a sick little one, and my husband always says "It's ok, just stay home with her." But then when he gets home, alone, he always talks about how much he missed me being there. We have such an important job to do in the service, even if it just looks like all we are doing is sitting in the pew. Thank the Lord we can also pray from home!

  4. And Sunday turned out wonderful. You got to be there after all and Pastor WAS surprised and he preached a wonderful sermon, like he always does!! God is so good!!!

  5. Thankyou so much for sharing! What a blessing for you to have someone from your church stay with the kids! This has been on my mind alot recently, as I've been missing a lot of weeks because of baby/toddler sickness, sickness myself, toilet training etc. My hubby is one of three pastors at our church though, so at least I don't miss him preaching every week, but I totally understand what you're saying. I do miss being there when he has to preach. I love to be there to support him, and he says that it isn't the same for him preaching when I'm not there. You put it so well Angie, very thankful we can pray from home! :)


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