No one tells you about what it takes to be a mom.
No one tells you how difficult pregnancy is. How you can't sleep, eat or control your bodily functions anymore.
No one tells you how that little baby growing inside you will attach itself to your heart and will never release you ever again.
No one tells you that your body takes on a life of it's own and that body that you thought was horrid before is the same body you would kill to have back again.
No one tells you how exhilarating it is to feel that little one's butterfly movements for the first time.
No one tells you how terrible labor is and how you will never, ever, ever, want to do that ever again.
No one tells you how you will hold your sweet little bundle of joy and be the happiest mom on the planet.
No one tells you that nursing is painful and vanquishes your social life.
No one tells you how precious and special nursing your child is.
No one tells you that starting from that moment you will soon become the sleep-deprived and unkempt, unshowered person that you always swore you never would become.
No one tells you that the first time your child smiles at you will suddenly become the best day of your life and your heart will want to burst in love.
No one tells you that changing poopy diapers will be that disgusting.
No one tells you that you will suddenly love to dance across the room and wave your hands around like a mad woman only to hear those first tiny giggles.
No one tells you that worry now seems to possess your mind completely.
No one tells you that crawling suddenly equals giving your child the keys to the car and watching the child drive away.
No one tells you that going to a movie with your husband is next to impossible.
No one tells you that your child will only fall asleep in your arms which makes you feel so loved.
No one tells you that date night is a pipe dream because your child will only fall asleep in your arms.
No one tells you that your child will finally sleep through the night.
No one tells you that the next morning you will be scared to death your child died instead of just sleeping through the night.
No one tells you that weaning is a huge blessing and you may be able to have a tiny social life again.
No one tells you that you will miss nursing.
No one tells you that bribery will become second nature to your parenting skills.
No one tells you that bribery will help your child take their first steps.
No one tells you that discipline will become one of the biggest mysteries that seems to evade you and your child.
No one tells you that all of the books written about parenting did not include your child.
No one tells you the joy experienced when your child obeys you for the first time and makes the discipline all worth it.
No one tells you that you will get tired of discipling the right way and yell and scream at your child.
No one tells you that you will cry tears of sorrow at your actions and hug your child and your child hugs you back to let you know it's all right, he still loves you.
No one tells you how letting the doctors pinch, prick, or cut open your child will make you want to kill someone for the first time in your life.
No one tells you that if your child gets sick, your non-cuddler child will want to cuddle with the love of their life - you.
No one tells you that if you get sick no one cares.
No one tells you that you will victoriously potty-train your 18 month old in 2 weeks.
No one tells you that potty-training will go out the window the second you move to another location and it will be another year before you want to tackle it again.
No one tells you that potty-training is not that difficult!
No one tells you that poopy-training is another story.
No one tells you that your child will be the most talented child you have ever seen.
No one tells you that those talents will include finger-painting her poopy glory all over the nursery walls, bed, toys . . .
No one tells you that you will love your child so much that all of these bad things last only for a moment and the good things become precious memories that will last a lifetime.
That's why no one tells you.
by Ann Stringer
dedicated to my daughter Aimee who inspired me this morning when I walked into her room and discovered encrusted poop all over the walls, toys, and carpet and as I was cleaning it I was furious that no one tells you about these mom-things that will take over your life.
But yet, I understand why.
